


5 Things to Put in a Pentagram to Summon Raphael Santiago

by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:29:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23649982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: Simon, desperate for any hint of what Raphael likes in an attempt to flirt with him, resorts to memes in a subtle attempt to trick the answers out of him.
Relationships: Simon Lewis/Raphael Santiago
Comments: 30
Kudos: 210
Collections: SHBingo





	5 Things to Put in a Pentagram to Summon Raphael Santiago

**Author's Note:**

> For my Shadowhunters Bingo square: Pentagram

Simon sends another one of those ‘about you’ sorts of memes to Raphael - this one is meant to be a list of choose ‘this’ or ‘that’ options, except Raphael doesn’t answer any of them and instead sends a wall of text back about why anyone would choose either of those options, or that he hasn’t even _heard_ of the actors or shows listed, and- 

Simon sighs, dropping his phone onto his chest as he sits on Clary’s sofa. 

“Trouble in paradise?” Clary asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“It isn’t working,” Simon says with another dramatic sigh. “I keep sending him those question memes to try and find out _something_ he likes that I can use, but he just keeps _criticizing_ them instead of giving me anything to work with.” 

“You could just ask him,” Clary points out. 

Simon balks at the idea. “Oh, yeah, sure, because it’s so simple. Let me just go up to the leader of the vampire clan and ask him what his favorite flowers are so I can get them for him.” 

“It’s clearly better than sending him memes that ask if he prefers roses or carnations,” Clary points out. 

“Because the answer is neither, they’re both so cliche,” Simon offers. “At least I’m getting a great idea of what he _doesn’t_ like. Soon I’ll be able to narrow it down, right?” 

Simon flips through his social media, his eyes catching on another meme - but this one is perfect. It’s practically fate that he finds it now of all times. 

“Clary, I got it!” he yells victoriously, jumping off of the sofa to walk over and shove his phone in her face. 

“The pentagram meme?” Clary asks dubiously. “Why is this your sudden revelation when all the others failed?” 

“ _Because_ ,” Simon says. “5 Things to Put in a Pentagram to Summon Me. It’s _flawless_. He’ll tell me five of his favorite things, or at least five things he at least vaguely likes, and I can use that!” 

Simon hits send and waits. He knows Raphael is meeting with Magnus so he’s probably too busy to keep checking his phone, but whenever he does get it--

Simon’s phone dings and he opens the message from Raphael immediately. 

His face falls. 

_Raphael- ...why would you need 5 things, you know all it takes is grave dirt to summon a vampire, right? You don’t even need a pentagram._

Simon sighs. “Fine, you were right. I give up.” 

\-------------

Raphael’s phone buzzes in his pocket and he doesn’t have to check to know that it’s Simon. Again. 

“Are you going to see who it is?” Magnus asks. “It could be important.” 

“Or it could be Simon with another ridiculous question game,” Raphael counters. He does check his phone because he’s the leader of the Brooklyn Vampire Clan and the one time he decides to ignore his phone would be the time the Dumort ends up on fire or something, but he only proves himself right when he sees Simon’s name and opens the message to find something about a pentagram. 

“This is the fourth one this week,” Raphael mutters as he types out the obvious answer to what would be needed to summon him anywhere, which Simon definitely already knows. 

“What are they, exactly?” Magnus asks. There’s something about the too-curious, lead-in tone of voice he has that makes Raphael immediately doubt the innocence of the question. 

“They’re questions… ridiculous ‘would you choose this or that’ questions, or pointless lists of favorites, or this… honestly, I don’t even know what this last thing one _is_.” 

Magnus hums to himself, a smirk playing at the corners of his lips. 

“What?” Raphael demands. He doesn’t like that look at all. 

“Can I see them?” Magnus asks, holding his hand out expectantly. Raphael can’t imagine how it would hurt so he hands his phone over, and watches as the smirk on Magnus’ face only spreads the more he scrolls down. “Oh, that poor boy,” Magnus mutters to himself while laughing. “Raphael, I don’t know how to break it to you… but I believe our dear Simon has a crush on you.” 

Raphael nearly chokes on the air he doesn’t need to breathe, an instinctive reaction of shock. “I beg your pardon?” 

“He’s trying to find out things you like,” Magnus points out, like it should be the most obvious conclusion to draw. “This last one? ‘5 Things to Put in a Pentagram to Summon Me?” 

“A ridiculous question, you know that-” 

“Yes, yes. But this isn’t meant to be _realistic_ , it’s a silly mundane meme. You were supposed to tell him your five favorite things. And I’ll bet you any money if you did, he’d find a way to get them for you.” 

“Why wouldn’t he just say he likes me? Or _ask_ me what I like?” Raphael says, grabbing his phone back and scrolling through the messages from Simon again. With that new idea in mind, he can see what Magnus is implying even if he doesn’t quite believe it or understand it. 

“I mean… you _are_ a little intimidating.” 

“I am not,” Raphael says, but knows the words are a lie before he finishes them. Perhaps he is a little intimidating, but it comes with the territory. But also, perhaps he’s been a little extra dismissive of Simon lately, in no small part because he hasn’t known what to do with how _close_ Simon keeps trying to get to him. At least now he knows why. 

“I should call him and ask if he’s trying to flirt with me,” Raphael decides. The moment he goes to pull up Simon’s number his phone is snatched from his hands. 

“Absolutely not, you’ll scare him off forever. He’ll never admit it like that,” Magnus explains with a shake of his head. 

“Then what do you propose I do?” Raphael sighs. He’s entirely out of his element here. 

“Well,” Magnus starts slowly. “If you’re not entirely opposed to the idea…” he lets the sentence fall off in a question and Raphael groans at the realization that Magnus is going to make him say it out loud. 

“I’m not. He’s… endearing. In his own way.” 

“I thought so,” Magnus beams. “In which case, you answer his pentagram question. Give him five things to woo you with.” 

“Okay. I can do that.” Raphael takes his phone back and considers his answer thoroughly before typing. 

**Raphael: But if we’re ignoring the laws of vampire summoning, then I suppose my pentagram would be made of my car, a very strong bloody mary, a well-tailored suit, Charlie Chaplin movies, and the smell of my mother’s cooking.**

He isn’t sure what Simon is going to do with that information, but at least now he can get on with the actual business he came here to discuss with Magnus. 

\-------------

It takes Simon a few days to get everything he needs. His timing, however, couldn’t be better. Raphael’s been very tense the last few days, with a new fledgling testing his patience even more than Simon had when he first arrived, tensions with the werewolves again, and that was all on top of his usual grumpiness.

The poor guy needed some time away, or at least a break from the constant pressure he keeps putting himself under. So while he’s out one night Simon gets everything ready for his return in the morning - he got his hands on an entire collection of Charlie Chaplin movies, a batch of bloody marys Maia promises are strong enough to knock even Raphael off his feet, and even though he’s set up a relaxing atmosphere with the piles of blankets and pillows carefully arranged in a pile on the floor in front of the projector, instead of wearing the pajama pants Simon so desperately craves he’s dressed in a very well-tailored suit. In fact, it’s the suit Raphael let him borrow for Alec’s wedding that he may or may not have very intentionally forgotten to give back. And, to top it all off, in the corner burns a candle Simon found called ‘Homesick’ meant to smell of Mexican spices and cooking. 

He couldn’t work in the car, because _how is he supposed to work an entire car into this definitely-not-a-date_ , but he hopes that four out of five is good enough. 

Simon paces relentlessly, going over what he wants to say in his head a few times. He has a few lines he’s been practicing, about Raphael deserving to be taken care of and to be happy. That’s usually as far as he gets before it dissolves into increasingly panicked rambling about how he’d totally understand if he isn’t the one Raphael wants for those things, and even in his head it usually ends with Simon fleeing before he can embarrass himself too much, which doesn’t really bode well for how things will actually go when Raphael shows up. 

All he can do now is wait. 

\-------------

Raphael is in a worse mood than usual when he gets back to the Dumort with mere minutes to spare before sunrise. He’s exhausted and frustrated, and beyond any limit on his patience after the full night of ‘territory debate’ he engaged in with the local werewolves after thinking they were beyond all of that these days. 

“Why does the hotel smell like food?” 

It’s the first thing that hits him the moment he steps inside. It’s faint from the first-floor entryway but present to his heightened sense of smell. 

“No one knows. It’s coming from Simon’s room but he won’t let anyone in here. Just told me to tell you to go up there when you’re back, so I guess you’re going to be the lucky one to find out,” Lily says with a curious look on her face. 

Raphael sighs. He isn’t in the mood for whatever miniature disaster Simon’s got going on right now, but he does at least go up to tell Simon as much before he plans on retreating to his room to decompress for the remainder of the day. 

Raphael gives a single courtesy knock before turning the handle and opening the door. 

“Simon, I don’t have time for whatever-” Raphael starts, but the words fall silent abruptly at the sight before him. He catches Simon pacing and muttering to himself in front of a pile of pillows and blankets in front of a projector with a stack of DVDs next to it with Charlie Chaplin at the top and a pitcher of bloody mary. The smell from before is much stronger now, and also a lot clearer - jalapeno, butter, cream, caraway, a hint of smoke… It smells like home. Not Brooklyn, but Mexico, where he was born. He can practically see his mother standing in front of him cooking just from the scent of it as he closes his eyes and breathes it in fully. 

By the time Raphael’s taken in the little details of everything Simon clearly took the time and effort to gather and set up for him, Simon is already fumbling out an apology over Raphael’s initial outburst of annoyance. 

“Sorry. I should’ve asked if you were busy first. I just… shit, just pretend none of this exists, and-” 

“Is this for me?” Raphael cuts him off. He knows it is - it’s almost everything he listed out on his text to Simon the other day - but even as he looks at it he doesn’t quite believe it. 

“Yeah,” Simon says, the smallest hint of a hopeful smile making its way back onto his face. “You’ve just been so stressed lately, and I thought… I thought I could do something nice for you.” 

“You’re wearing a suit,” Raphael observes. “You know, I never did get to see that on you when you borrowed it before. It looks good on you.” 

Simon practically beams at the compliment. It’s a short-lived expression that’s replaced immediately with panic at Raphael’s next question. 

“Is this a date?” 

Simon sputters. “I... I mean, it doesn’t have to be. We can just… hang out. Or I can leave. And you can just relax on your own. In fact, yeah, you do that and I’ll just go now,” Simon says, the jumbled words coming out very quickly. 

Magnus was right. Simon _was_ trying to flirt with him. How did he not see it before? 

“Simon, wait,” Raphael says quickly, before Simon can get to the door. “I’d like it if you stayed.” 

“You would?” Simon asks, obviously surprised. 

“I would,” Raphael confirms. “And I wouldn’t mind if it _were_ a date. If you wanted it to be.” 

Simon gapes. “Oh. Oh! Okay. Then… yes. This is definitely a date. I would like for this to be a date.” 

Raphael laughs. “This might be the nicest thing anyone’s done for me in a very long time, you know,” he admits. 

“You deserve it,” Simon tells him simply. “Do you like it? And be honest. I can take it.”

Raphael refrains from telling Simon that if he said he didn’t like it he’s pretty sure Simon might actually burst into tears, though it doesn’t matter because he does like it, much more than he imagined he would. In fact... 

“I love it,” Raphael promises. “The suit part was more for me, though. You don’t have to keep that on if you don’t want to.” 

“Oh thank goodness,” Simon sighs. “Because it’s nice and all but I cannot imagine sitting through all those movies in this. Be right back.” 

When Simon returns in jeans and a band t-shirt they play some of the movies while sharing the pitcher of bloody mary, with Raphael explaining that they’re his favorites because his mother would play them all the time while he was younger. She always loved how universal they were, being silent movies and given that she spoke very little English when they first arrived in the States and that they reminded him of her as much as the smell of her cooking did. Simon tells him all about the ‘homesick’ candle he found called ‘Mexico’ so Raphael can order more for when he’s feeling particularly nostalgic. They laugh at the silly, mindless comedy and by the middle of the day Raphael can barely remember why he was in such a foul mood earlier. 

“Thanks, Simon. I really enjoyed this,” Raphael says when the movies are over, the drinks are gone, and they both need to get some sleep. 

“Does that mean you’d want to do it again sometime, maybe?” Simon asks hopefully. 

“Only if you promise to actually ask me on a date instead of sending me internet quizzes,” Raphael counters. 

“Hey, it worked, didn’t it?” Simon argues. “But fine. Will you go on another date with me?” 

“Yes,” Raphael agrees. “But I’m planning the next one.” 

“Deal,” Simon agrees. He hesitates by the doorway for a moment and Raphael can practically _see_ him overthinking whatever gives him pause. Then Simon moves back into the room to put a hand on either side of Raphael’s shoulders, placing a quick kiss onto his cheek before he turns again and leaves. 

Raphael refuses to admit how charming that kiss is. He does, however, grab his phone and send Simon the ‘5 Things to Put in a Pentagram to Summon Me’ meme. He has a second date to plan, after all. 

It doesn’t take long for his phone to buzz with a text back from Simon and Raphael’s never been more grateful to be alone so that no one can see the entirely-too-fond look that crosses his face at the reply. 

**Simon: You, You, You, You, and You.**

**Author's Note:**

> (Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com) and also on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/By_The_Angell)! <3 )


End file.
